Marimo Cuisine
by Beloved Fool
Summary: ZoroSanji Drabbles
1. A Dish Best Served Cold I

**Title:** A Dish Best Served Cold  
**Rating:** PG - PG13 for mild swearing and thoughts of violence  
**Word Count:** 298 after some impromptu editing  
**Pairing:** SaZo but maybe not really  
**Topic:** Revenge.  
**A/N;** My first One Piece fic. There's gonna be more to this story, hopefully several parts.

It was if the damned marimo-head was doing it _deliberately_. which , all things considered i.e., their constant bickering/beating each other up, didn't come as much as a surprise to him on reflection. Then again, this was new. It was as if the swordsman had suddenly thought of a cunning plan to screw with the cook the most with the least amount of effort. Which, apart from the thinking part, aforementioned cook thought just as likely as the fighting. Whatever, it was freaking him the hell _out_ and something needed to be done about this _now_.

The blond turned from where he had been smoking and staring out to sea and marched over to the green-haired man who was predictably leaning back against the railing, both hands behind his head, eyes closed now he had apparently finished trying to bore a hole through the back of Sanji's head with them.

'Oi, kuso-swordsman...'

'What, ero-cook?' One eye cracked open, telling him this had better be good. Sanji almost poked it with the cigarette still smouldering between his fingers.

'What the hell are you doing?'

'...Eh? What the hell are _you_ on about?'

'_Staring_, constantly _staring_...what is it, have I got something on my back?'

There it was, that _look_ again, like it should have been obvious or something that even Luffy would know. Damn marimo-head. He was gonna get a bea-

Sanji grinned. _Deviously._ He had an _idea_. The grin turned shark-like and now both of Zoro's eyes were open and there was _fear_ present.

'Oi, ero-cook, what-'

Sanji leaned down and _kissed him_. The ero-cook had actually moved in and was, in real life, in plain view of anyone who was to come up to the upper deck, KISSING HIM.

When Sanji stepped back, triumphant, Zoro stared some more.

---

Comments, constructive criticism welcome because I haven't written anything well for a long, long time ; I'd like to know how I did on my first try...(¬ ¬;) ZoLu is also a pairing I want to try out as well as many Ace pairings as I can get away with ♥.


	2. A Dish Best Served Cold II

**Title: **A Dish Best Served Cold  
**Rating: **PG-PG13 for mild swearing  
**Word Count: **300  
**Pairing: **SaZostill barely there ;;  
**A/N;** XD I tried my best with this but I'm still not happy with the way it turned out...aaaa n/m.

_Where the hell did that come from_ were the words of the question that was trying to barrage its way past Zoro's lips every time he came face-to-face with the cook for days after that. The one time he did manage to ask, he had only scowled his darkest at the blond and opened his mouth to speak, but the shitty curly-browed cook had beaten him to it with a smirk, a _smirk_ goddamnit that he was going to wipe off that idiot's face for good one day, and had just shrugged.

'Just think of it as revenge,' he said, passing the swordsman another plate to dry. 'I couldn't shake off the feeling something very ugly and stupid was staring at me and lo, I turn round and there you are.' The smirk widened. 'Made you stop though, right?'

Zoro sputtered a bit but he managed to get the words out to inform the love-cook, very firmly and in less than three words that his theory that he had been staring at the other man was completely wrong. Sanji kicked him in the head, careful to watch that the stupid marimo-idiot didn't drop the plate he was holding in the process.

'Oi,' he said, frowning. 'No language like that where Nami-san or Robin-chan can hear, shitty swordsman. Why the hell were you looking like that then, if you weren't staring?'

'…your left eye.' Sanji almost dropped a plate himself.

'Huh? _What? _What about it?' Zoro kept on drying plates.

'I've never seen it, your hair's always in the way…I was just thinking…'

There was a moment's silence while Sanji struggled with his surprise and the _very _slight blush on his face by viciously attacking a particularly stubborn stain instead of the moron beside him.

'…idiot…hurt yourself doing that.'

* * *

Comments and constructive criticism welcome 


	3. When You Look Like That Honey

**Title:** When You Look Like That Honey  
**Rating:** pg13  
**Word Count:** 299  
**Pairing:** ZoSa  
**Topic:** Pirate Booty

* * *

The cook swatted the other's hand from his ass for the fiftieth time since he'd started preparing dinner.

'Oi, shitty swordsman, can't you see I'm _busy_ here?' The idiot, somehow taking that as an invitation to grope him some _more_, grinned and moved in again, this time receiving a kick to the head to knock it into him that Sanji wasn't as amused_ by far_.

'No means _no, _marimo-head, unless you'd like me to give you the extensive course in manners?' His tone was low and threatening but Zoro leered anyway, the moron probably turned on as hell by the thought. He reached in, and, avoiding the rain of kicks bestowed upon him by Sanji like the blond was some kind of vengeful god, pinched the cook on the behind, kissed him (smashed their lips together) and grinning like the devil, dodged his way out of the galley, the other's screams of rage following him out.

'ARGH THAT'S IT OUT, _OUT._ I NEVER WANT TO SEE YOU AGAIN SHITTY MARIMO-HEAD SWORDSMORON.'

All in all though, Zoro thought it was _so_ worth it, especially the way those trousers tightened over Sanji's lower half when he was scything those deadly legs through the air. Zoro grinned like a cat who'd not only got the cream but was looking forward to seconds too, as he hid in the armoury, waiting for the blond's ire to die down. Closing his eyes, he settled down for a nap but not before the mental image of the cook the other night as he had been, panting insults desperately into the swordsman's ear, as Zoro had been moving inside him, flashed through his mind. Grinning wider still, he knew that tonight he'd be showing the stupid ero-cook all over again what groping _really_ was all about.


	4. The World Is A Stage

**Title: **The World Is A Stage**  
Author: **macabreromansu/vonuberwald**  
Fandom: **One Piece**  
Character(s)/Pairing(s): **Zoro/Sanji  
**Prompt: **'Pantomime' from onepieceyaoi100  
**Word Count: ** 266**  
Rating: ** PG-15**  
Warnings: **A little sex (as in seriously minimal), a little swearing (again, _minute_)**  
Summary: **Shakespeare it is not.**  
Notes: **LOL me again whut.

* * *

Sometimes, Sanji mused (although not very often), sometimes it all seemed like a splendidly staged production.

Grand adventures with a plucky pirate captain and his crew, he thought (briefly, before his mind shut down in paroxysms of terror), as he held on for dear life to the side as the Coup de Burst brought them hurtling back to the ocean after a particularly large movement.

With a _banging_ cast list, he added to himself as he brought Nami and Robin their afternoon teas complete with honey scones, fluffy cream and tea in knuckle-bitingly fragile porcelain cups.

Except for the ones who inevitably get through the cracks, he amended as he kicked Usopp and Luffy across the deck for the third time that day for stealing mikan.

The soundtrack too, is amazing, he smiled to himself as he thought that and exhaled a puff of smoke. Leaning back on the side of the deck on the lawn, he listened to Brook play, the ladies' quiet laughter as they chatted, and later, the sound of steel-on-steel, Luffy's whooping as he kicked marine ass.

And finally, the after party, he grinned before gasping and choking out a moan as Zoro, pumped up from battle, bit down on sensitive skin and _moved_, with him and around him and they lay together afterwards, satisfied but not yet exhausted.

Sanji looked over at Zoro.

'...What?'

'Mm, nothing. Just wondering if that was it.'

Zoro's eyes bugged. 'The he—Shitty cook...'

He growled and Sanji grinned in anticipation, yelping as Zoro suddenly rolled them over with him on top.

'Here's your fucking encore...!'


	5. Some Days

**Title: **Some Days**  
Author: **macabreromansu/vonuberwald**  
Fandom: **One Piece**  
Character(s)/Pairing(s): **Zoro/Sanji  
**Prompt:** 2:00pm**  
Words: **263**  
Rating: ** R for safety**  
Warnings: **Sexxx**  
Summary: ** A late lunch is definitely in order.**  
Notes: ** 8Db HEY GUYZ

* * *

Everyday like clockwork, lunch on the Thousand sunny is served at 2.00pm. Sometimes there's no helping being late though, marines or other pirates usually being too happy to delay Sanji's feast.

On these days, the afternoon schedule is usually let hang in favour of tidying up the debris left by someone's attack or a random unconscious body to be hauled back over to their own ship.

On these days, Zoro takes the opportunity to corner Sanji in some unoccupied place on the ship and work off the adrenaline of a good fight or the frustration of a boring one.

'Mmf-get of-nn_gh_!'

Sanji supposes a little token resistance is expected of him.

Zoro smirks. The chef is clearly fooling nobody.

A short while later and Sanji's face is pressed to Zoro's neck in an effort to muffle the sounds he's making. Zoro shifts the angle he is thrusting at and Sanji lifts his face and throws his head back a bit, Zoro takes this opportunity to move in to scrape the hollow of his throat teeth, no less feral for all their bluntness.

_Holy crap_, Sanji thinks. _Why was resisting_ this _so important again_?

He opens his mouth to hiss encouragement at the swordsman, freezing up all over as a very loud, horribly familiar voice echoes very close to where they are currently, ahem, making out like trapped rabbits.

'SAAAANJIIIIIII! LUUUNCH!'

Zoro stops then, as Sanji bangs his head a couple of times against his shoulder.

'…shit.'

'FOOOOOOD!'

Sometimes, just sometimes, Sanji wishes Luffy's stomach wasn't quite as accurate when it came to mealtimes.


End file.
